What is Autism, Actually?
Understanding the autistic experience
Autism is a neurodevelopmental condition, which is a fancy way of saying it is how our nervous system develops during early childhood.
The wiring of your nervous system is responsible for how your brain communicates with your body and vice versa; it affects many ways you perceive and behave within the world.
- • How you might control your motor functions
- • Experience your senses differently
- • Have a harder time regulating your internal physical state — or recognizing a feeling in your body
- • Thinking and processing information differently
- • Learning and committing things to memory atypically
- • Generally having a different level of awareness than your peers
(It's lots of stuff. So naturally, we function differently from most people.)
Is It a Disability?
Let's talk about "disabled" as a label. "Disabled" and "disability" are not negative or shameful terms. Instead, they express a disadvantage and a need for changes to be made to accommodate that person.
Think of it this way: Imagine if, one day, 99 percent of the population suddenly developed the ability to fly. Then, because most people can fly, a large portion of society's structures and daily tasks start requiring the ability to fly. Those who never developed that ability are now at a disadvantage. They are now disabled. That doesn't make them any less valuable or able than before things changed.
Disability means that you aren't able to do things the same way as most people, and as a result, the structure of society isn't entirely suited to your level of ability. I have a disability not because I'm different but because of the structure of the society that I live in.
Why We Created This
We want to help you learn about yourself, whether you have been formally diagnosed, are considering the possibility of self-diagnosis, or are just curious as to whether you might be on the spectrum.
It may also help others understand who you are and why you do certain things.
What Would It Look Like If I Had It?
(Here, we will use identity-first language; for example, "autistic" and "autistic person.")
Some traits you might experience as an autistic person are summarized below. Feel free to tackle this list slowly, and take time to make your own notes and observations.
🧠 Sensory & Processing
- ◦ Sensory issues (for any number of senses)
- ◦ Executive functioning issues (i.e. task switching, concentration)
- ◦ Special/obsessive interests
- ◦ Difficulty identifying what you're feeling and how to express it
- ◦ Literal interpretation/processing of information
- ◦ Poor story memory, but great detail memory
💬 Social & Communication
- ◦ Communication differences
- ◦ Difficulty fitting in, picking up on social cues
- ◦ Difficulty making and maintaining relationships
- ◦ Poor or excessive use of eye contact
- ◦ Masking autistic traits/mimicking neurotypical behaviours to fit in so well that you'd almost believe it yourself
- ◦ Echoing speech or phrases (or, for my family, two lines of a song) to yourself throughout the day
🎯 Thinking & Behavior
- ◦ "Black-and-white" or rigid thinking
- ◦ Needing structure/routine
- ◦ Anxiety around change
- ◦ Stimming/fidgeting
- ◦ Hiding or sitting in small or dark places
✨ Strengths
Note that everyone's experiences are different, but there are positives in every unique expression. Autism is a large part of a person's identity, and viewing it entirely negatively will hurt you in the long run.
Autistic Burnout
Autistic burnout is extreme mental, physical, or emotional exhaustion, accompanied by a reduced capacity for stress. Autistics already have a lower capacity for stress than most people, making it significantly more challenging to function when burnout occurs.
Autistic burnout can be caused by trying to understand, fit in, and manage the neurotypical structure.
Having one's needs understood and accommodated, receiving support, and having the freedom to be your authentic self can help prevent or recover from burnout.
Supporting Someone with ASD
(I use this hugging emoji loosely — your autistic friend might not want a hug.)
Here are some things to be aware of if you are trying to support the mental and emotional health of someone with ASD:
- • Sensory overload can cause distress. When autistics experience sensory overload, any sensitivities may also be intensified.
- • "I don't know" can be a true statement. Asking the question again or telling the person they must know isn't likely to generate a different answer.
- • Allow processing time. Autistic people may need more time to process information and respond.
- • Be patient with communication differences. What may seem like bluntness or rudeness is often just direct communication.
Identity-First vs Person-First Language
Identity-First (IFL)
"Autistic person" or "I am autistic"
Person-First (PFL)
"Person with autism"
Most people in the autistic community prefer identity-first language. Parents, professionals, and other neurotypicals prefer and are taught to use person-first language, even though it is not about them.
Many autistics view person-first language as harmful or ableist. PFL implies that the person's autism is viewed negatively, almost as if it were trying to separate the person from their autism. For instance, you wouldn't say "person with extroversion" or "person with competitiveness."
Autism is a huge part of who I am: it affects not only my personality but also my movements, thought patterns, and way of being. Autism is how my brain is wired; it is a part of me. I don't just have it; I am not separate from it. I am autistic, and I'm proud of it.
Ready to explore your own patterns?